There ain’t half some bloody odd names about for products aren’t there? I always think that the weirdest are the ones that go onnnnnnnnnnnn forever. By the time I’ve finished reading them, I’ve forgotten how they started. In the name of all things catchy, surely that can’t be good for memorability?
Skincare is particularly notorious for rubbish names, I guess the brand often needs to name-check the technologies involved *cough* Estee Lauder Daywear Sheer Tint Release Advanced Multi-Protection Anti-Oxidant Moisturizer SPF15 *cough* but really… surely it’s more important not to have your customer standing at the counter scratching their heads.
I know there are women out there who refuse to buy certain products because of their names. Mostly the sexually-oriented ones like: Orgasm & Deep Throat [NARS], Sexy Mother Pucker [Soap & Glory], MILF [Illamasqua] and the notoriously risque [Urban Decay] with shade names like: Jailbait, Gash & Fetish… or perhaps worse are the drug-loaded references in: Blow, Loaded, Baked, Yeyo, Narcotic and hell, don’t even get me started on [TooFaced’s] Pearl Necklace!
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Anyway, there’s not really much point to this post other than a ramble and to give props to the kooky names out there that never fail to put a smile on my face. Here are some of my favourites…
01: Bliss – No ‘Zit’ Sherlock
02: Lush – Lovely Jubblies
03: Tanatomicals – Get A Tan Without Looking Like Your Gran (my personal favourite!)
04: Soap & Glory – Super-Colour-Fabu-Lipstick
05: Cowshed – Grumpy Cow Uplifting Bath & Massage Oil
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What are some of your best and worst product names?
Haha, you really made me laugh. 😀 I don’t really remember any outstanding names (except for the classic ones that you already mentioned), but I know that OPI always has SO clever names for their polishes 😀
Haha, I love China Glaze, Tickle My Triangle for a shade name too!
Ahahah you gave voice to thoughts I had sooo many times! I’m italian and I totally love Lush products’names in my language as they often make great puns. For example I love “Brufolo Bill” which sounds like Buffalo Bill but its first word in my language actually means “zit” and it’s of course the name of a product meant for reducing zits and spots on oily skins.
‘No Zit, Sherlock!’ is excellent! Indie companies have the best names for thier products… some of them take it a bit too far though. Was talking with some other bloggers about how long would it be until someone named an eyeshadow ‘Blue Waffle.’
ROBYN!! I googled.
Y u no make me want waffles for life :((((
Apparently, sexed up names sell more, which is why many brands started copying UD and Illlamasqua :p I find them a bit OTT, like they are trying too hard, although in case of Illamasqua it goes with their image.
I used to find Benefit really cringy, but I quite like their cooky names – “Watts Up” and “I’m glam, therefore I am” 😀 I also like OPI names, they really are funny.
I also dislike MUA’s unnamed range – I remember you commenting on that. It just seems lazy-I know they are cheap, but how long would it take you to name a few eyeshadows?
I think my dream job would be naming OPI polishes. For sure!
You have shade-naming experience too, with that Sleek palette.You set them on the right path 😀
And yeah,eye bleach would come in handy :p
No to Blue Waffle, I do not recommend anyone google it!
I have no problems with dodgy names, but long ones get my goat, I lose interest!
Leighton Denny has some fab names for his polishes too, but I do wonder when he and OPI will run out of ideas!
I just googled it. Curse my curiosity
I need eye bleach.
If you hadn’t said don’t google it, I wouldn’t have been tempted. But I was. Ugh, gross!
Haha, I must admit I googled it after strict instructions not too!
One day I shall learn to ignore the husband when he tells me these things, many times have I needed eye bleach!
Benefit lipstick also have sexual related names: Flirt Alert and Nice Knickers. I think these are acceptable but have to admit that some of the Nars ones disturb me a little.
I liked Pout (any excuse to reminisce about the brand *sigh*) “Horny Hilda”, “Ditzy Doris”, all the lip liners were bra sizes, lipglosses in “Bite my Cherry”, “Pop my Bubble” seem rather tame now.
Maui Wowie belongs on that drug list! I googled it looking for the eyeshadow once and it came up with a whole bunch of marijuana references…
I think Nails Inc’s shade naming was great but has now gone belly up. Pink Chinatown and grey Southbank: excellent name-image-colour matches, but what’s up with a nude Warwick Way and a bright green Warwick Avenue (or was it vice versa)? Did London run out of street names?
Sexy Mother Pucker by Soap and Glory always makes me laugh. I love how this post ended up at blue waffle…..I’m glad I’ve had my tea before being reminded of that horror 😉
I have to say… the funny/crude names generally lure me into buying them!
I think Nars is the worst with their Orgasm, Super Orgasm, Deep Throat (whoa!), and now G-Spot? “Hello there, I would like to buy an Orgasm please!” “Would you like to try the Super Orgasm as well?” 😀
I quite enjoy most of the Anatomicals’ names,
“Anatomicals Tanatomicals Because Only Bacon Should Be Streaky”
“Anatomicals Tanatomicals The Holy Grail For The Deathly Pale”
and simply, “Anatomicals Another Bloody Shower Gel”
I don’t mind names like the ones you mentioned very much. I like Illamasqua’s creativity and weird names definitely go with the image of the brand. It would seem weird if they were to change certain names because some people find them offensive. *shrugs*
But I don’t live in an English speaking country, so it’s not really a problem anyway, I suppose.
Illamasqua ‘Load’ nail polish. The colour and the name together make it the last nail polish I would ever buy. It would be so off putting walking around with it on and knowing what it’s meant to represent 😛